I work at an abortion clinic, and love my job.

Hey all,

I have not posted in a long, incredibly long time.  I guess posting thoughts online has not been something I’ve made time for as of late, but it seems like a good time to change that.  With recent events, the presidential race, and my overall state of mind, I felt that it was right to share my experiences…hopefully shed some light on a complex issue.  One, I hope, does not have to be complex one day.

I work at an abortion clinic in Colorado.  I’m not going to say which one, in what city, or any specific details because it truly does not matter.  I have been there for over one year now, and truly love waking up and going to work every day.  We have a small staff but a large clinic, and see many patients throughout the week.  Although about 90% of our clinic’s focus is on abortion care, we still have a smaller side of the clinic dedicated to contraceptive and family-planning care.  Needless to say we’re pretty busy.

But, why I’m bringing this up, and why I feel like it’s important to talk about, is that abortion has been attacked a lot more recently than in the past few years, and I really want to know why the hell, in 2016, it is still up for debate?  Why is it, that my job is always on the line of being available or nonexistent even though I’m just there to provide health care?  These are questions I would love for someone to answer for me, because regardless of whether you are against having an abortion yourself, or you think someone should have full access, what you believe should never interfere with the basic right of health care for other people.  Right?  Or is that too much of a considerate thought for humans to respect each other at a basic level?

Every single day, I have patients from all walks of life.  All ethnicities, all ages (of available fertility) from various different backgrounds, speaking different languages, and from multiple financial statuses…all coming in for the same appointment.  They all have different stories.  Some come from difficult backgrounds that don’t allow them to provide for raising a child, some pregnancies resulted from rape, some  from an abusive partner, or some patients are minors that can’t even drive yet.  Yes…there are definitely stories like that.  Those are always the stories people want to hear when they consider abortion as acceptable.  People want to hear a difficult story full of hardship, so as to make the abortion justified.  But what about everyone else?  Actually, to be more honest…what about the other 75% of people that do not have a difficult story, and really just do not want to be pregnant or be a parent right then?  Is that not..ok?

I learned, as I have been working at my clinic, that it really is ok to not have a meaningful story to explain your abortion.  I don’t care.  Whatever reason you made it to your appointment and are continuing with your decision, it doesn’t matter.  No one should ever need to compare your story with someone else’s to see if one is worthy of a procedure over the other.  I will never be able to fully understand the complexities of your life, nor should anyone try to.  And the reason you want to have an abortion is not the main concern – the only thing that matters is that having an abortion is the decision you made for yourself (of course, only for yourself and no one is forcing you to do this).  That’s it.  That is all I need to know.  Unfortunately that’s a fact that took me a little while to completely understand, but I’m glad I did.

Having an abortion is an extremely safe process, whether it is through medication or a suction procedure.  The in-clinic procedure takes about 5-10 minutes for first-trimester pregnancies, and maybe 20-25 minutes for second-trimester.  Our clinic cannot perform procedures past 19 weeks so I can’t comment on third-trimester abortions, but I would definitely check out the documentary “After Teller” if you want more information on that process.  It does not affect your fertility in the future.  You can get pregnant within 2 weeks of having an abortion.  Also, in the rare instances that there are complications, they are almost always solved quickly and safely.  These are facts that people do not know, whether because of ignorance or lack of education.  So please, understand the facts before drawing conclusions on outdated and skewed information.  It is simple, easy, minimal risks, and can be less invasive than most medical procedures people have every single day.

Now, recently there was a shooting in Colorado Springs at the Planned Parenthood clinic.  I know people that work there.  They were there that day.  I found out about the shooting as I was visiting my family for the holidays, finishing some last minute shopping with my mom.  That was one of the most shocking moments of my life.  Not that an active shooter as a possibility is a surprise, but that these attacks have become so close to home.  We have protestors almost every single day and, although for the first week it bothered me, it quickly became an ignorable nuisance.  However, for the past few months, there has always been a small underlying hesitation of…what if?

It is sad to think that people can justify killing abortion providers as a healthier alternative than abortions being practiced.  You’re the murderer, you are killing a life.  In the Colorado Springs case, three lives.

I’m wholeheartedly proud of my job, and love my coworkers that are just as passionate about patient care.  There is nothing anyone could ever do to change my desire to be a part of abortion care, hopefully for the rest of my future career.  It is a medical procedure that should be as accessible as a colonoscopy.  Yeah, no one ever wants to do a colonoscopy, just like no one wants to have an abortion.  But safety and availability is very important for the two.  So please, regardless of your personal opinions, let that be so.  I love my job, let me keep it.


Glamorized Jobs: the “Sexy Bartender”

coyote ugly

So I know I’ve explained earlier that I bartend, and have been doing it for about 3 years now (to some, I’m still an amateur, and I’m ok with that).  And based on my experience, although limited, I’ve seen the glamorization that comes with the job.  For some reason, bartenders are automatically really cool people.  The bartender handles alcohol, is knowledgeable about alcohol, and presents a welcoming personality for the crowd they are waiting on.  Along with all that, it is a customer service position, and it is usually a position filled by someone a bit more outgoing, experienced in life, and easily to talk to.  These are all traits that can obviously seem very attractive to the bar attendees.

However, I still find it very baffling that, regardless of the environment, the bartender comes off as far more alluring than that particular person would be if they were not tending bar.  And this could be alluring in a sexual manner, in a dangerous way, or just an exciting curiosity.  Nevertheless, the bartender is has suddenly elevated in a level of attraction.

I’ve bartended for bars, clubs, strip clubs, restaurants, and catering companies.  You can say I’ve been around a majority of different environments that bartenders would be present.  And, in every single situation, there was not a single shift that went by where I wasn’t talked to by someone with greater interest than is necessary.  This either led to a lengthy conversation about my background, an asking for my phone number, or a questioning of my relationship status.

Now…what leads people to do this?  I’m a moderately attractive woman, no Coyote Ugly chicka, but I have been hit on in random, daily situations on occasion.  But, this never happens nowhere near as often as while I’m working.  When I’m bartending, it’s as if suddenly I turned into Jennifer Lawrence and all eyes on me, when before I walked in the room unnoticed.

With all this, I guess it’s just being in a position of serving alcohol while trying to seem appealing to others.  All the while, working in a position that has been sexualized by media.  Look at receptionists, air stewards, housekeepers, and many others that have fallen in the same stereotype: a female in a position of service and willing to be taken advantage of.  (And, before I go further, I understand this pertains to men in the same situation, but I’m female, so that’s what I go with at first, sorry.)  This creates this allure of being open to anything and everything…at your service.

As much as I love bartending, and still enjoy most of the interactions I have with my customers and co-workers, this never-ending glamorization still bothers and confuses me.  It doesn’t help either that my cousin, a single, older male, wants to become a bartender to meet women, even though he’s had the same secure job for years.  Great, not like people do it for an actual living or anything.

From Bartender to Office Rep..what now?

It’s been exactly 1 year and 6 days since I walked across the stage and picked up my Bachelor’s Degree from AU.  It took me this long to finally land a full time job.  Not just any job, an adult job, with benefits and all.  I was bartending a wedding two nights ago and tried to imagine how I’d feel going to an office each day and sitting down for 8 hours.  Sitting is something I don’t usually do, especially while I make money, so this will be quite a challenge.

Also, I’m moving from Chicago to Denver by the end of next month, so if anyone has advice on that, let me know.

It seems scary to think that I’ll build a monotonous routine with this job eventually.  I mean, to be honest, it will be a struggle.  I’m used to moving around, talking to people, making jokes, making drinks, cleaning things, eating good food, and building and breaking things down.  How can I go from that to taking phone calls in an office?  It’s hard to imagine, but hey, I want to do it.  At least for now, I do.

I just hope that my forcing myself into this lifestyle of “young professional” doesn’t waste the young years in my life when I can be out exploring the world.  I don’t want to have to wait till I’m 65 to do that.  No one should.

So, in conclusion, I’m done ranting about being a young unemployed bartender, and will probably start eventually ranting about being the “young professional” I’m expected to be.  I’ve been wanting this for so long, but now that it’s here, it’s kind of terrifying.

Time is Now – Russell Brand

He’s hilarious and brilliant.  Those two traits, at times, seem to go hand in hand, especially with Russell Brand.  I think, out of the obvious inspiring words that any intellectual being can’t not appreciate, what made this video stand out from all the others on this website is the way Russell Brand explains his ideas.  He does not hold back and does not give a shit.  He just, speaks.  Not only that, he speaks of what people are really thinking.  Then he explains how we should actually do something about the hungry dog in each of us yearning for some god damn righteous scraps.

This information is not new, and everyone is aware of it’s daily effects.  The 1% will always be real and get worse unless we actually believe…the time is now to change that.


Kitchen’s gods and goddesses / Virtuvės dievai ir dievaitės

This person is awesomeness. Follow his/her instructions on almond milk! I’m going to.


Some food items become part of kitchen’s interior. They wouldn’t leave and we can’t imagine a “normal” kitchen without them. They are like gods and goddesses, just sitting there at all times. For example, when I was growing up we ALWAYS had milk, eggs, sugar and bread. Now I have replaced those gods with new ones and am eager to share with you my nominees for the place on the Healthier Kitchen’s Mount Olympus.


#1 Almond Milk

Dear readers, I invite you to leave those cows alone and start making your own milk. You ask why? It’s fun, it’s healthy, it will make you feel like a superhero (not many people can brag about making milk).


When I first started making milk from almonds, my motivation was to add more healthy foods into my life. Now, I am addicted to it. I make it myself, because commercial nut milk…

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Jobs. The unemployed life of a 22 year old (Part 2)

So, to continue the rant I started earlier, I want to revisit how college brought us nowhere.  As bleak as that sounds.  However, I’ll reflect on my own personal experiences.

To get by and pay  for rent, food, various spending, furniture, bike repairs, and everything else…oh man, everything else…I got into the food industry.  First, I was a hostess at an Indian restaurant, then a server and cashier at a pizza place for a couple years, and finally became a bartender and have been sticking to that for the past 2 and half years.  I’ve always wanted to bartend for some reason, so I can never complain about it.  It’s great money, easy, and fun.

But isn’t it funny that a large majority of college students actually end up in the food industry for awhile?…“Oh you graduated college?  Great, take these burgers to table 24 for 3 years.”

Nevertheless, all that work took up a lot of my time in college.  It affected my studies, took away from the chance to participate in extracurricular activities, and didn’t free up my schedule to take up internships.  Now, the food industry is nice.  They’ll hire you if you don’t have a degree yet.  The Department of Agriculture most likely won’t even consider you unless you’ll work for free.  So I didn’t have much of a choice.  Did most people?…Not really.  Because of this, my resume isn’t ideal.

And that’s what I’m stuck with.  Applying online to hundreds of jobs (currently I’m at 192) with only my resume and a lousy cover letter to show for everything I did the past 22 years.  I graduated with my school saying “You have your degree!  Jobs will come begging for you!”…but then I had to realize after traveling that indeed a Bachelor’s Degree means the same a high school degree.  College is the new high school.

It doesn’t mean anything anymore!  One my closest friends never went to college and had the same exact catering gig that I had in New York.  Now he’s traveling through Southeast Asia and loving life.  He is more financially secure than I am.  What.

Here’s an example (that probably everyone knows now) of what employers are actually looking for: http://www.naceweb.org/about-us/press/skills-qualities-employers-want.aspx

Now, can anyone tell me they actually learn all of those qualities from college?  I would say probably not.  Definitely not.

So this is life these days.  We get in heaps of debt to pay for 18 years of school that teach us information on random subjects that have nothing to do with practical, real-life situations.  Then, we’re expected to graduate with impeccable grades, already having some sort of professional experience with no pay, expected to know how to pay our taxes, and have a grasp on leadership, teamwork,  and selling techniques which is what Employers actually look for.

It seems that something is amiss…

Jobs. The unemployed life of a 22 year old. (Part 1)

So I’ve been spending most of my daily life for the past three months searching for…..Jobs.  Reaching almost a year after I graduated from college with a bachelor’s degree in psychology, I haven’t had much luck in securing that much needed full time job.  However it’s funny thinking about the concept of needing a job, and this video sums it up perfectly:


If you watch it and laugh, instead of sit confused, then you understand the idiocy of America’s “job market”.  People all across the country are going through the same thing – graduate from college, being told that the world is now at their feet, then slowly realizing that the world does not care if you have a degree, so they start working at restaurants, retail shops, and administrative assistant positions (that require only a high school degree).  Oh, and the best part, we’re all in thousands of dollars of debt.  Empty pockets, but thousand to owe.  

I think the funny twist though, is that my generation is considered lazy and unmotivated to do anything with our lives.  I would like to know where the motivation is supposed to come from when this “degree” that seems oh so important at the time, won’t actually get us anywhere?  There are no jobs out of college.  Sure, there are the lucky few that land incredible positions for some huge company, corporation, organization, what have you.  But man, that is so far and in between.  And what’s hilarious about that sometimes is most of those incredible positions come after 1-2 years of bitch work for free.  Unpaid internships: one of the worst things that ever happened to college students.  Not only is the capitalistic system already messed up where CEOs sit around and make millions, but college students work their asses off while also trying to “get an education”…for free.  It’s one thing to volunteer for the goodness of others.  It’s another to be an unpaid intern.  

When I think of the time I’ve spent working toward a degree while juggling paid restaurant jobs, unpaid internships, and various activities that I all thought would look good on, the one and only, resume, it saddens me to think that I can only fill the shoes of a high school degree position.  Why the hell did I go to college?


New day, New blog

So I decided to switch from Tumblr to WordPress – I feel like I’m switching from TjMaxx to Armani or something, it’s so fancy.  Well we shall see how this plays out and if anyone cares to read.  At least on Tumblr, I have followers and can follow others.  Not sure if it works the same on here.  Guess we’ll find out!  Anyway, this is a blog about anything and everything.  I enjoy the comforts of food, as do most humans, so that will definitely be a returning subject.  Also, clothes, psychology, gender, music, sex, movies, politics, traveling, and maybe just some pictures of a puppy.  Please enjoy!  I might be writing to no one, but oh well. :]

To start, here’s a picture of a beach off the Australian east coast.  Australia was and still kind of is my life.  Love you, man.